Next Time I’ll Buy A New Dress

Living in a rural area, meeting new people is hard and finding a suitable mate outside school or church is darn near impossible. So a friend suggested that I give online dating a whirl before completely resigning from the dating scene

Turns out, online dating only expedited the resignation

Yikes. Guys. You wouldn’t believe the things I saw and the things men seem to think are suitable pick up lines. I know some people who are happily married after meeting their spouses this way but I’m guessing they’re in the minority.

Another friend keeps sending me stories about women murdered by guys they met online. That seems to be his way of showing support and was helpful in keeping my trust issues alive.

If you’re considering online dating, here’s some friendly advice. Gentlemen, take off the hat, shave and smile for the camera. No one wants to date a sad looking guy who can’t even smile to make a good first impression. Gals, my advice for you is to look for red flags and trust your gut. You don’t owe anyone anything and if a fella is pressuring you to meet and you’re not ready, that’s his problem and not yours. There are a lot of crazies out there and I encountered several that seem to fit that category.

But honestly, I wouldn’t bother. My philosophy is that I need to go out and live my life and be happy. If someone comes along, great. If not, well … I’m happy anyway!

My subscription expires today and I am relieved that it’s over and I can stop feeling guilty for wasting the money. Next time, I’ll just spend the money on a new dress and take myself out to dinner!

12 thoughts on “Next Time I’ll Buy A New Dress

  1. Exciting! And yes it’s always better to be a little too wise when it comes to making decisions related to dating. Specially for us, girls. And it’s really great that you don’t chase guys like some others do. Just keep growing yourself, keep achieving your goals and when you find someone who can walk with you with unconditional love throughout your life journey, yeah then build an empire with him and have fun.

    Have a wonderful day 😊

    • Honestly, I’m not even looking anymore. It seems sort of pointless, especially given that I already have a good life. It is astounding to me how many men complain about women who only take advantage of them and yet they’re turned off by one that says she doesn’t need someone to support her but wants someone to be happy with. It’s just weird to me! Thanks so much for reading and for your encouraging message!

  2. Over half of the people I know (myself included) have found their long-term partners via online dating. However, you’re right- we had to suffer through a lot of, erm, “unpleasant” communications along the way. We found making light of it all and not depending on it actually just made it quite fun. My partner of 5 years was my 10th date (about 6 months into online dating). Although I continued with online dating despite the weirdnesses, I agree that your attitude of not depending on it happening is key.

    • How lovely! I’m happy for you. For me, it was an utter waste of money and an exercise in frustration and worry. The overall dating scene is significantly different than the last time I was dating (about ten years ago) and I do not fit well with the changes. Luckily, I’m not lonely and my life as it is suits me fine. If this recent experience is any indication, it will always be just me and I’m ok with that. Thanks for reading and for sharing your story!!

  3. Back in the pre-online days I tried a personal ad. Sure wished I hadn’t! Your plan is a good one. There are men who appreciate an independent partner, but some are looking for a sugar-mama. The good ones are out there, though. But even staying single is a good way to go.

  4. WOW!! Glad I’m not single! Our daughter, Gwen, met her husband on a D&D MUD. Been married 25+ years. He works for NSA (so does their son!) so watch what you say on the phone!!!! Just kidding.

    Pick up lines: when I was much younger and had hair AND with a first name of Richard: “Hi, I’m rich” worked well. I met my wife in England (we were both in the USAF) and she was at a function wearing civilian clothes and I told here “Nice ass”. Next thing I know I’m married with two more kids!!! That was 38 years ago and we are still together, so I guess that pick up line worked.

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